Boys' Rites of Passage

Our Sons' Futures

Are You Screwing Your Son Up?

Posted by Thomas on December 5, 2011

This post has 194 words and will take you less than 2 ½ minutes to read. 

When my son was younger at the time I became a more aware father (aware of my shortcomings) I fretted over screwing my son up. Not giving him what he needed in order to be successful in life. I worried about not offering enough love, guidance, discipline, and validation.

Then I had the “Ah ha!” moment. All parents screw up their kids in some way! Why? Because parents are not perfect and neither are our children. And, even if we (parents) did everything ‘correct’ that may not be the way your son sees it.

If you agonize over whether or not you are messing up your child…the answer is “Yes” you are. But, through open and honest communication wherein we share our failings and struggles with our sons (especially the teens) two things happen: 1) sons realize their dads are human, not super-human 2) if dad can make a mistake, exercise poor judgment and live through it, sons learn they can overcome as well.

Be mindful of your shortcomings and mitigate them appropriately but don’t drive yourself frantic thinking your failings are permanently damaging your son (or children). He will be just fine.



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