Boys' Rites of Passage

Our Sons' Futures

Do You Have Your Child on a Pedestal?

Posted by Thomas on November 1, 2011

Before you continue: 

This post has 254 words. 

On average, it will take you less than 3 minutes to read. 

I recently had separate conversations with two colleagues. We were talking about our children. Both said (a father and a mother) “Oh no, she’s much smarter than I was at that age.” They made me think about my son. I remember him telling me once “Pop, you think more highly of me than you ought to. Stop putting me on a pedestal.” 

As we continued talking his point was simple: “Hey, I’m not perfect.” The caution that came out of that conversation was, for me as a parent, don’t be disappointed if (or when) your child doesn’t live up to your expectations. 

I think it’s hard to not place our children on pedestals. They are our hope and legacies in so many ways. But, as parents, we must find balance. 

We cannot project so much of what we want for them to the point of stifling their interests, personality, and creativity. At some magical mile-marker on the road of parenthood we must shift into the guiding mode and not the telling mode; stepping slightly aside, enough to allow them to blossom into their excellent self. 

Even with that understanding I believe our children will always be on pedestals in our hearts and minds. I think it comes with the territory of parenthood. As long as we temper our thoughts with the reality that they, as young adults, are their own person all is well. 

Today my son leaves for the U.S. Coast Guard. Today I have him on the tallest pedestal of all. 



2 Responses to “Do You Have Your Child on a Pedestal?”

  1. Thomas said

    Marcie: Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment. As a caring adult to children this entire site can help all of us, even if we happen not to be parents.


  2. Marcie Hill said

    Very enlightening. I am not a parent, but post placed something on my mind.

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